Post by mattass on May 25, 2006 21:57:47 GMT 1
We sat down and watched as Matt was interviewed on telly, Tara walked into the kitchen and was fixing something for her to drink when I heard my name being yelled from the kitchen and big thump as someone hit themselves.
"NO" I yelled and ran into the kitchen.
"No.. Tara.." mumbled Danny and helped me look at her. She had hit her head on the kitchen table and was bleeding like mad.
"Call an ambulance... Matt and Charlie too.." I yelled and smacked her face. "Tara come on... talk to me... tara honey....God damn... Answer.... Tara..."
When the ambulance people arrived Matt and Charlie was on their way to the hospital. Getting to the hospital she was brought in for a check and fixing. Charlie and Matt ran up to me when we arrived.
"How is she?" Asked Matt practically shaking me.
"I dont know... I dont FUCKING KNOW" I yelled breaking down in tears. What the hell was going on? First the baby, now her hitting her head. What if she was going to die now? She did after all fall. Nothing else had happened then her telling us she was dying. So this was something we didnt need. I didnt need this. What I needed was her in my arms, her body next to me. Her promises of life. Thats all I wanted. I guess god hated me so bad so he was taking the love of my life away from me.
"Sheesh.. We all want her to be okay.. dont yell like that.." Muttered Charlie.
"Well how would you feel if it was Camilla.. I FUCKING LOVE TARA... AND YOU KNOW WHAT? IM GOING TO LOSE HER SOON... SHE DYING... I JUST WANT HER TO BE WITH ME BY MY SIDE FOREVER... I CANT FUCKING EXPLAIN HOW MUCH I WANT HER TO BE IN MY LIFE... IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR? HAVING HER BY MY SIDE TIL WE DIE TOGETHER?" I screamed sinking to the ground. Charlie sat down and pulled me into a hug. All the anger and pain i felt knowing she was dying was pouring out now.
"We are here for you james... every step of the way.. we all love her... you and Dave are the only ones who got close to her... " Said Matt. I shot up and looked at Dave.
"Yeah.. you .. you fucking left like that ... I cant fucking explain how i want to kick your ass.... " I said pushing him. Steve had to take Brianna away so i wouldnt hurt her.
"Dude..stop" Said Tom and stepped between. I looked at him and sank my glare to my shoes before I turned around and looked at the front desk of the hospital.
One hour later a doctor came up to us, I shot up and looked at him ready to hit if he didnt give me the answer i was looking for.
"She is going to be okay, and the baby is fine... " He said with a smile. I was so happy now, she was going to be okay. Not that okay but enough for now. We were showed to the room she was in. She smiled as we walked in, her forhead having this big white bandage plastered to it. I gulped and sat down giving her a perfect smile.
"Marry me..." I suddenly blurted out.
"Well its a little to sudden.." Said Danny with a cheesy grin.
"Not you moron... Her" Said Matt and hit Dannys head playfully.
"What?" She asked and looked at James.
"Marry me.... I bloody want you as my companion til your gone.. I love you so much... I dont have words to explain how much i love you..." I Said.
She looked at Dave who, well i was going to say sorry to, smiled and nodded. I looked at her again. She nodded and gulped for air.
"Really?" I asked shocked.
"M-m" She hiccupped and I shot up giving her a kiss.
"At least she gets who she really wants" Said Dave with a smile and teary eyes.
"For 9 months yeah... I will be able to see our baby for 3 months... after that ... I cant..." She said.
"You have 9 months left?" Asked Charlie.
"Im sorry..."
We spent about 3 hours there before she was ready to go, 1 month went along and the wedding stood.
- Matt -
"Could you give me away tomorrow?" Asked Tara and looked at me.
"Well sure honey tha-what?" I asked.
"I dont know who else...and I really care about you.. You and I have gotten along the best so..." She said.
"Sure thing sweety... I appriciate it that you want me to give you away to James..."
- James -
"I cant wait til tomorrow .... she is going to be mine..." I said and looked at Charlie. Nick was right next to him smiling.
"You both deserve each other..." Said Nick. He had been there all the way through it all, since I met her. Somehow I felt it was thanks to Dave. He had told me about the place, that night.
"Thanks bro" I said and smiled. Still... I couldnt help but feel scared. She was going to die in 8 months. I only had 8 months left to spend with her. And that... really made the press go nuts when they found out. Not that I really cared about that. It was our lives and not theirs.
"Well time to hit the sack..." I said and got up. Tara and Dave was at Matts place for the night til the wedding tomorrow.
"Yep, Im knackered..." Said Charlie. Going to bed that night I smiled. Tomorrow morning.. Tara Goldebert was becoming Tara Bourne. My life was becoming complete allthough I knew she was going to die... and leave me.
The next morning I woke up at 6, I was totally ready for the wedding. Allthough it didnt start until 11. When I got downstairs I saw Charlie and Matt in the living room.
"How you feeling?" Asked Matt.
"Nervous.. but more like happy... Im getting my girl soon... " I said with teary eyes looking at them.
"I know, she asked me to give her away.. " Said Matt.
"She did?" Asked Charlie.
"Yeah, i guess.. we have been getting more along... "
"True" Mumbled Charlie.
I got ready around 9 and went to the church at 10. There was fans everywhere when i stepped outside the limo and looked around at driveway of the church. The press was there as well. Some fans screamed and I went over to them.
"James... my gosh.. you are getting the right girl" Said a chick bout Tara`s age.
"Thanks.. I think so too.." I said with a huge grin.
"Good luck, give her my best... She is lucky.." Said the girl next to her.
"No.. Im the lucky one... " I said and turned around.
"Ready?" Asked Matt and Charlie.
"Born ready..." I mumbled and walked up to the church steps. Inside the people was gathering, I peeked inside, there was my friends, family and celebrities I had invited.
When the time was there I stepped inside saw Kara talking to Steve, I walked over to them.
"Are guys ready?" I asked. Tara had asked Kara to be her maid of honour (?).
"Yes... Hey James.." Said Kara as I was about to step up next to Steve at the alter.
"Yeah? What is it?" I asked.
"Good luck. You got the right girl" She said kissing my cheek.
"Thanks.... and thanks for doing this for her.." I said hugging her.
"Anything for you and her.."
I stepped up at the alter next to Steve who smiled and hit my arm playfully. The music started 10 minutes later as Charlie and Kara came in. First the flower girls. Then.... the music changed ... Tara was about to enter. My heart skipped a beat and I drew in a deep breath.
"Here she comes.... you ready?" whispered Steve.
"You no idea...." I smiled. A shadow was closing near the doors, and she came in focus. I lost my breath seeing her, she had her head bent down, Matt was shining like a light during the pit dark night. In the middle of the walk she looked and our eyes met. I was so sure my smile beat every smile. Seeing her coming closer towards me was so great. In a few minutes.. she would be my wife. I stepped down as they reached me and smiled at her.
"She is yours now... finally...." Said Matt and went to stand next to Steve and Charlie.
The priest started:
"We are gathered here today to stand as a witness of an amazing journey that is about to begin... the love between to people, James Elliout Vaughn Bourne and Tara Elizabeth Ann Goldbert.... they found each other in an unclear way over a year ago. That meeting was the stand point of a life changing situation.... love... They now are ready to take a step further into the little time they have left with each other you and who are here to share their moment. Marriage and their soon to be baby... "
I managed to click out the rest and say my part in this, when i heard: You may kiss the bride. I did.
Tara and I had an amazing time together after that. We had a little baby boy near october and 3 months later it all ended. She died peacfully on january 6th in our house.
I learned to love again after the meeting I had that night. And i so not regret it at all. I learned to see the life the way i was showed to. She was everything for me that girl. And I sure couldnt amagine that she was gone now. I couldnt see life clearly when she died. But then... Matt held the speech in her funeral... where everybody that i didnt even know showed up. There was people packed in the church, outside and blocks away. People who had known her barely showed up to show their sorry for our loss.
During the funeral Matt stepped up took the mic and he sat down looking straight into my eyes and nodded.
I know you are all sorry for our loss of a great person who opened my bestfriends eyes.
And so am I, no one can replace the person Tara was, she was so amazing.
She didnt want people to get into her heart.
But one did.
He managed to break the walls she had built up the year she moved to London.
I cant even figure out how he did it.
She was so amazing, gave up drugs and alcohol when James stepped into her life.
Im not sure if everyone knows how they met.
So i might as well tell you all.
One night... James got dumped by his girlfriend of 4 months and decided to go to a spot Dave Williams had told him about. It changed his life.
That moment he broke up the door, tara was about to commit suicide and he saved her. Like she saved him from drowning in his own sorrows.
6 years of constant pain was released from her shoulders.
You all knew her as the druggie she had been, but james, Charlie and I ... we got to know her as Tara Goldbert.
She was the most amazing person in the world that was.
You couldnt look for anything like her.
She had been standing on her own two feet for 6 years alone.
With the support of an old friend. Dave.
She moved into James` house that night they met and things happened.
Charlie and I got closer to her. James as well. Better than we.
And now.. here we all stand saying goodbye to her.
But one thing is better, there is two memories left of her. Brianna and Dean her children.
- The end -
"NO" I yelled and ran into the kitchen.
"No.. Tara.." mumbled Danny and helped me look at her. She had hit her head on the kitchen table and was bleeding like mad.
"Call an ambulance... Matt and Charlie too.." I yelled and smacked her face. "Tara come on... talk to me... tara honey....God damn... Answer.... Tara..."
When the ambulance people arrived Matt and Charlie was on their way to the hospital. Getting to the hospital she was brought in for a check and fixing. Charlie and Matt ran up to me when we arrived.
"How is she?" Asked Matt practically shaking me.
"I dont know... I dont FUCKING KNOW" I yelled breaking down in tears. What the hell was going on? First the baby, now her hitting her head. What if she was going to die now? She did after all fall. Nothing else had happened then her telling us she was dying. So this was something we didnt need. I didnt need this. What I needed was her in my arms, her body next to me. Her promises of life. Thats all I wanted. I guess god hated me so bad so he was taking the love of my life away from me.
"Sheesh.. We all want her to be okay.. dont yell like that.." Muttered Charlie.
"Well how would you feel if it was Camilla.. I FUCKING LOVE TARA... AND YOU KNOW WHAT? IM GOING TO LOSE HER SOON... SHE DYING... I JUST WANT HER TO BE WITH ME BY MY SIDE FOREVER... I CANT FUCKING EXPLAIN HOW MUCH I WANT HER TO BE IN MY LIFE... IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR? HAVING HER BY MY SIDE TIL WE DIE TOGETHER?" I screamed sinking to the ground. Charlie sat down and pulled me into a hug. All the anger and pain i felt knowing she was dying was pouring out now.
"We are here for you james... every step of the way.. we all love her... you and Dave are the only ones who got close to her... " Said Matt. I shot up and looked at Dave.
"Yeah.. you .. you fucking left like that ... I cant fucking explain how i want to kick your ass.... " I said pushing him. Steve had to take Brianna away so i wouldnt hurt her.
"Dude..stop" Said Tom and stepped between. I looked at him and sank my glare to my shoes before I turned around and looked at the front desk of the hospital.
One hour later a doctor came up to us, I shot up and looked at him ready to hit if he didnt give me the answer i was looking for.
"She is going to be okay, and the baby is fine... " He said with a smile. I was so happy now, she was going to be okay. Not that okay but enough for now. We were showed to the room she was in. She smiled as we walked in, her forhead having this big white bandage plastered to it. I gulped and sat down giving her a perfect smile.
"Marry me..." I suddenly blurted out.
"Well its a little to sudden.." Said Danny with a cheesy grin.
"Not you moron... Her" Said Matt and hit Dannys head playfully.
"What?" She asked and looked at James.
"Marry me.... I bloody want you as my companion til your gone.. I love you so much... I dont have words to explain how much i love you..." I Said.
She looked at Dave who, well i was going to say sorry to, smiled and nodded. I looked at her again. She nodded and gulped for air.
"Really?" I asked shocked.
"M-m" She hiccupped and I shot up giving her a kiss.
"At least she gets who she really wants" Said Dave with a smile and teary eyes.
"For 9 months yeah... I will be able to see our baby for 3 months... after that ... I cant..." She said.
"You have 9 months left?" Asked Charlie.
"Im sorry..."
We spent about 3 hours there before she was ready to go, 1 month went along and the wedding stood.
- Matt -
"Could you give me away tomorrow?" Asked Tara and looked at me.
"Well sure honey tha-what?" I asked.
"I dont know who else...and I really care about you.. You and I have gotten along the best so..." She said.
"Sure thing sweety... I appriciate it that you want me to give you away to James..."
- James -
"I cant wait til tomorrow .... she is going to be mine..." I said and looked at Charlie. Nick was right next to him smiling.
"You both deserve each other..." Said Nick. He had been there all the way through it all, since I met her. Somehow I felt it was thanks to Dave. He had told me about the place, that night.
"Thanks bro" I said and smiled. Still... I couldnt help but feel scared. She was going to die in 8 months. I only had 8 months left to spend with her. And that... really made the press go nuts when they found out. Not that I really cared about that. It was our lives and not theirs.
"Well time to hit the sack..." I said and got up. Tara and Dave was at Matts place for the night til the wedding tomorrow.
"Yep, Im knackered..." Said Charlie. Going to bed that night I smiled. Tomorrow morning.. Tara Goldebert was becoming Tara Bourne. My life was becoming complete allthough I knew she was going to die... and leave me.
The next morning I woke up at 6, I was totally ready for the wedding. Allthough it didnt start until 11. When I got downstairs I saw Charlie and Matt in the living room.
"How you feeling?" Asked Matt.
"Nervous.. but more like happy... Im getting my girl soon... " I said with teary eyes looking at them.
"I know, she asked me to give her away.. " Said Matt.
"She did?" Asked Charlie.
"Yeah, i guess.. we have been getting more along... "
"True" Mumbled Charlie.
I got ready around 9 and went to the church at 10. There was fans everywhere when i stepped outside the limo and looked around at driveway of the church. The press was there as well. Some fans screamed and I went over to them.
"James... my gosh.. you are getting the right girl" Said a chick bout Tara`s age.
"Thanks.. I think so too.." I said with a huge grin.
"Good luck, give her my best... She is lucky.." Said the girl next to her.
"No.. Im the lucky one... " I said and turned around.
"Ready?" Asked Matt and Charlie.
"Born ready..." I mumbled and walked up to the church steps. Inside the people was gathering, I peeked inside, there was my friends, family and celebrities I had invited.
When the time was there I stepped inside saw Kara talking to Steve, I walked over to them.
"Are guys ready?" I asked. Tara had asked Kara to be her maid of honour (?).
"Yes... Hey James.." Said Kara as I was about to step up next to Steve at the alter.
"Yeah? What is it?" I asked.
"Good luck. You got the right girl" She said kissing my cheek.
"Thanks.... and thanks for doing this for her.." I said hugging her.
"Anything for you and her.."
I stepped up at the alter next to Steve who smiled and hit my arm playfully. The music started 10 minutes later as Charlie and Kara came in. First the flower girls. Then.... the music changed ... Tara was about to enter. My heart skipped a beat and I drew in a deep breath.
"Here she comes.... you ready?" whispered Steve.
"You no idea...." I smiled. A shadow was closing near the doors, and she came in focus. I lost my breath seeing her, she had her head bent down, Matt was shining like a light during the pit dark night. In the middle of the walk she looked and our eyes met. I was so sure my smile beat every smile. Seeing her coming closer towards me was so great. In a few minutes.. she would be my wife. I stepped down as they reached me and smiled at her.
"She is yours now... finally...." Said Matt and went to stand next to Steve and Charlie.
The priest started:
"We are gathered here today to stand as a witness of an amazing journey that is about to begin... the love between to people, James Elliout Vaughn Bourne and Tara Elizabeth Ann Goldbert.... they found each other in an unclear way over a year ago. That meeting was the stand point of a life changing situation.... love... They now are ready to take a step further into the little time they have left with each other you and who are here to share their moment. Marriage and their soon to be baby... "
I managed to click out the rest and say my part in this, when i heard: You may kiss the bride. I did.
Tara and I had an amazing time together after that. We had a little baby boy near october and 3 months later it all ended. She died peacfully on january 6th in our house.
I learned to love again after the meeting I had that night. And i so not regret it at all. I learned to see the life the way i was showed to. She was everything for me that girl. And I sure couldnt amagine that she was gone now. I couldnt see life clearly when she died. But then... Matt held the speech in her funeral... where everybody that i didnt even know showed up. There was people packed in the church, outside and blocks away. People who had known her barely showed up to show their sorry for our loss.
During the funeral Matt stepped up took the mic and he sat down looking straight into my eyes and nodded.
I know you are all sorry for our loss of a great person who opened my bestfriends eyes.
And so am I, no one can replace the person Tara was, she was so amazing.
She didnt want people to get into her heart.
But one did.
He managed to break the walls she had built up the year she moved to London.
I cant even figure out how he did it.
She was so amazing, gave up drugs and alcohol when James stepped into her life.
Im not sure if everyone knows how they met.
So i might as well tell you all.
One night... James got dumped by his girlfriend of 4 months and decided to go to a spot Dave Williams had told him about. It changed his life.
That moment he broke up the door, tara was about to commit suicide and he saved her. Like she saved him from drowning in his own sorrows.
6 years of constant pain was released from her shoulders.
You all knew her as the druggie she had been, but james, Charlie and I ... we got to know her as Tara Goldbert.
She was the most amazing person in the world that was.
You couldnt look for anything like her.
She had been standing on her own two feet for 6 years alone.
With the support of an old friend. Dave.
She moved into James` house that night they met and things happened.
Charlie and I got closer to her. James as well. Better than we.
And now.. here we all stand saying goodbye to her.
But one thing is better, there is two memories left of her. Brianna and Dean her children.
- The end -